“Why are there holes in my ‘Daily Mail’?”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
Alan Partridge quotes: Awkward moments
“I’ve narrowed it down to ‘Lord House’, ‘Ace House’, and ‘The Cinnamons’.”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
“I think I’ll just call it ‘Ye house’.”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
“Bill Oddie gave me a dressing gown as a Christmas present. He enclosed a receipt so I could take it back if I wanted to. I submitted Oddie’s receipt for tax purposes.”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
“Ah, wolves at the door. You’ll huff, and you’ll puff, and… where’s the other one, where’s the other pig?”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
“Yeah. Well, they’d died, so… I buried them.”
Alan Partridge · Welcome to the Places of My Life · Welcome To The Places Of My Life
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“That’s another old trick, spike the drink, pop you in the boot of the Lexus and dump you in the North sea.”
Alan Partridge · I'm Alan Partridge · Episode 5 – I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
“At 800 square feet, they’re larger than a good quality dentist’s and could house a Tesco Express.”
Alan Partridge · Welcome to the Places of My Life · Welcome To The Places Of My Life
“The space I park in used to be for the disabled, but after lengthy discussions, I got them to rub out the wheelchair.”
Alan Partridge · Welcome to the Places of My Life · Welcome To The Places Of My Life
“My watch is waterproof.”
Alan Partridge · Welcome to the Places of My Life · Welcome To The Places Of My Life
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